The city was bustling with every type of noise: cars honking at other cars, cars honking at pedestrians who were too slow in walking for their liking, and people chatting loudly to be heard by others over the loud horns. Maddy was not new to any of this. Heck, this city has been her home for the last 10 years. She hung her head low, dug her hands in her pockets, her eyes tracking the familiar cracks on the pavement. This time, she felt like a ghost walking amongst the living; this feeling was typically invisible and unnoticed, but today it was growing on her. Staying far away from her for all this time has taught her to be self-dependent, but today, she was feeling like she was running out of something.
Walking on her way to work, the route she followed almost every day without giving it much thought, she stopped at her usual coffeehouse. About to walk in, Maddy noticed the guy who dropped some coins onto the sidewalk, hurriedly picking them while keeping his voice low, muttering profane words. Sensing the frustration almost immediately, Maddy went towards the man to help the coins from rolling onto the street with oncoming traffic. Post returning all of the collected coins, she heard the man mutter a hoarse “okay, thanks” under his breath, sparing a nod of acknowledgement towards her. A moment shared between two strangers, neither of them would recall tomorrow, left her feeling better about helping someone in need. Putting it back on her, she continued with her day.
Upon reaching her workplace, she sat down at her desk. Looking straight ahead in her cubicle, she traced her forefinger over the photo of her family back when she was in her hometown for Christmas 4 years ago. Her family, consisting of two siblings, both married off in different countries away from her, her parents, retired generals from their posts in service, were enjoying their retirement by doing community services, weekly gatherings at their friends’ place, and travelling whenever they had time. She could call them to feel better, but chose not to disturb them in the middle of the night, as they were in a different time zone than her.
When work ended like a regular day at work, she grabbed her stuff and started walking towards the train station to go out and sit by the sea every time she felt low. Walking in the metro, Maddy saw a mother struggling as she was trying to contain her 5-year-old from disturbing other passengers. He was wailing, tugging at her mother’s shirt, and asking for time left on the journey repeatedly. Finding herself a seat opposite the mother and son, Maddy gave an acknowledgement nod to the other as if trying to say, “I see you and I understand your efforts.” Looking at the kid, Maddy reached into her office bag and pulled out a piece of newspaper. Looking at the kid, she asked, “Hey, did you know you can paper planes with this?” Through his teary eyes, the child slightly nodded a no.
Looking at the mother, Maddy asked, “May I?” and asked for permission to come sit next to her. The mother happily nodded a yes, and Maddy sat next to her. Carefully tearing the piece of newspaper from the bunch, she began folding the newspaper into a small paper plane. Paying full attention to Maddy, the child immediately stopped being hysterical and looked at her intently. After making the child a paper plane, Maddy asked the little boy to give it a go. Holding it in his little hands, the child yelped in joy. She found that the Mother gently put her hand over Maddy’s and muttered a light “thank you.” In this moment, Maddy forgot everything about feeling invisible. She found a glimmer of warmth in unexpected moments, and she saw other passengers looking at her with a smile.
Upon reaching her destination, she realized that the city was still crowded, noisy, and in hurry as usual. However, she was feeling a lot different towards it now. For the first time in weeks, she smiled to herself and realised she was not entirely invisible. The city has not lost her; she just did not know what she was looking for all this time. These little connections with others made her realise she was not entirely alone.
And for now, this was enough.
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